Today has been one of those days. You know the kind that does not turn out at all like you thought it was going to? It started out pretty good. Spent a little fun time before school wrestling with my girls, and my oldest still letting me walk her into school means more than words can say.
I then went to the hospital to visit a very dear friend, church member and all around precious soul. She was having gall bladder surgery and was so appreciative of me being there – her attitude and spirit bless me. This sweet lady has mailed me a card of encouragement at least once a week for the last 12 years. I then spent the bulk of the morning with her son, who I have talked with several times through the years, but had my best opportunity to really minister to him this morning. I think it really was meaningful for him to have me there and I was glad that I could be.
When I left the hospital, I should have been flying high, but instead I was feeling big time BLAH! It just seemed to get worse as the day went on. No real reason to feel that way, nothing bad happened. It just seemed to come out of no where and all the praying and reminding myself of the promises of God’s Word just couldn’t shake it.
Then tonight, I found myself thinking about home. Not where I was born or grew up. I’m talking about Heaven – my spiritual home. God called me into ministry to help people find their way there and to get ready for home. I realized tonight that my BLAH feeling was homesickness.
I love my family and friends here on this earth. I love the ministry that I get to do everyday, but inside of me there is a part of me that is longing for home. I want to see my Savior face to face. I want to feel his embrace. I want to worship him without any of the hindrances of sinful earth. I know it sounds selfish, but some days when my body and mind become tired of the battle, my spirit longs and yearns for home.
It’s not selfishness. I can’t really explain it. And the Spirit always helps me through it by refreshing my faith, renewing my spirit and reviving my tired life. So here I am at the end of the day at a better place, a little closer to home and feeling a lot better!